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What do you have in December that you don't have in any other month?

The letter "D".

What do you call a polar bear wearing ear muffs?

Anything you want. He can't hear you!

What do you call a chicken at the North Pole?

Lost.

Just before Christmas, an honest politician, a generous lawyer and Santa Claus were riding in the elevator of a very posh hotel. Just before the doors opened they all noticed a $20 bill lying on the floor. Which one picked it up?

Santa of course, because the other two don't exist!