Steven Petrow is known for his columns and essays about aging, health, and civility in The Washington Post and The New York Times. He is an award-winning journalist and a contributor to NPR, among other news outlets. His TED Talk, "Three Ways to Practice Civility," has nearly 2 million views. He's the author of six previous books, including the bestselling Stupid Things I Won't Do When I Get Old.

Below, Petrow shares five key insights from his new book, The Joy You Make: Find the Silver Linings -- Even on Your Darkest Days. Listen to the audio version -- read by Petrow himself -- in the Next Big Idea App.

That included me at the outset. Like many, I conflated joy with happiness, its shinier first cousin. Over time, I came to understand that joy is more self-sustaining and gratifying than happiness. Think of happiness as a sugary treat, whereas joy is like a whole wheat muffin. The treat boosts your glucose level, resulting in a sugar high, and then you crash. The healthier muffin is metabolized more slowly, with no big highs or lows, leaving you satisfied for longer.

The Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu shared a similar perspective in The Book of Joy. Joy is much bigger than happiness. While happiness is often seen as dependent on external circumstances, joy starts within. Happiness is eating a fudge brownie. Joy is making a pan of brownies to share. Happiness is learning you've gone into remission or been cured. Joy is holding the hand of a loved one going through a challenging illness, even if they don't get well.